Jagan
by Miss Jagan
Summary: I think the title sums it up nicely but there's a better summary inside.  Jagan


**A/N. Hi. This is Miss Fenway's slash side. I am Miss Jagan. Haha. I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. James and Logan are the best and they are so cute together and they make me explode because they can be awesomely bromantic or romantic and I still love them. Now, I'm not accusing either of them of being gay. I'm simply saying that they are only the second slash pairing I have EVER supported in the history of my fan fiction history and that's saying something. Anyway, now that I've tried to explain myself, this is simply an alternate ending to my 100 Themes Challenge for 'Teamwork' on my Miss Fenway profile. It picks up right where the original leaves off so you may have to read that if you want this to make any sense. Because I am far too lazy to rewrite it. I still don't own anything.**

Just then, a doctor pokes his head in. "Sorry to interrupt boys, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave. Logan needs his rest."

James stiffens at the words and pulls out of the four way hug. "All of us?" He asks, trying to keep the stress out of his voice. He wants Logan to get rest but he doesn't want to leave him alone in the hospital either.

The doctor steps into the room and ponders James' question before he shakes his head slowly. "No, I suppose it couldn't hurt if one of you stayed with him." He says reluctantly.

"I'll stay." James says before Kendall and Carlos can bother even opening their mouths. He sees the surprise in Carlos' eyes but there's also understanding there and James relaxes. Kendall is another story however, something that doesn't surprise James one bit.

"Wait a second James," The tall blonde cuts in. "Why should you get to stay?"

"Because," James answers, proud of the calm in his voice. "You and Carlos can go tell Jo and all the girls what happened. It's not like I have a girlfriend who's worried sick right now."

He has a point and Kendall knows it. So the leader grudgingly backs off, muttering something about James needing a girlfriend. "Want us to tell Camille anything?" He asks Logan as he gives the younger boy a farewell hug.

Logan looks embarrassed and uncomfortable. He rubs the back of his neck, bringing a smile to James' face at the sight of the familiar gesture. "Tell her I'll see her tomorrow." He mutters, looking down at his lap.

Carlos is next and is unusually gentle with Logan. "See ya tomorrow, buddy." His voice is a little sad and James feels bad that he's the one who gets to stay with Logan. At the same time though, he isn't about to back down so he gives Carlos and Kendall short hugs then waves to them as they walk backwards out the door.

It's just James and Logan then and both boys are silent for a few minutes. Then Logan sighs wearily and lays back in his bed. His gaze is on James though, who is distracted. "Everything okay, James?" He asks softly.

James flinches at the tone of Logan's voice. It's gentle and caring even though James should be worried about Logan and not the other way around. He pastes a smile on his face. "I'm fine, Logie." He uses his pet name for Logan who blushes. The color is a nice change from the pale and James relaxes a little. "I was just worried about you." His voice drops to a whisper and he moves from his metal chair to the large bed next to Logan.

They have been friends for twelve years and had also been comfortable with sharing a bed even at seventeen. Logan shifts slightly so that James has more room and looks up at him, blinking sleepily. "I'm sorry I worried you guys." He mumbles around a yawn.

James pulls Logan closer to him and looks him straight in the eyes. "Don't ever scare me like that again, okay?" His voice shakes and he forgets all about including Kendall and Carlos. "I can't lose you, Logan."

Logan is tired but he's awake enough to be surprised by the intensity in James' voice. "I'm sorry, James." He drops his head and rests it on James' chest. "Can you forgive me?"

James' anger at Logan's carelessness fades at the close contact and his breathing quickens slightly. "There's nothing to forgive." He whispers. "I just want to make sure you take better care of yourself." He smiles slightly. "Because I'll be watching you like a hawk from now on."

Logan grins at the teasing and then sighs deeply. The beat of James' heart against his temple is soothing and he feels himself drifting off to a much needed sleep. "I love you, James. You're the best big brother I could ask for."

For some reason, James' heart constricts painfully when Logan calls him a big brother but he masks his true feelings and laughs. "What about Kendall?" He asks curiously.

Logan yawns before answering. "Kendall's great too." He says sleepily. "But he can be scary sometimes. I know he's just protective but it's too much. You? You make me feel safe. Like now."

His words soothe the pang in James' chest for the time being and he gently drapes an arm over Logan. "Get some sleep." He whispers.

It's not long before Logan is sound asleep on his chest. James shuts his eyes, listening to Logan's steady breathing. He's unspeakably grateful that Logan is still there with him after the earlier scare. He trembles slightly as he remembers the way Logan looked right before he passed out and fell into James' arms. He'll never forget how Logan didn't respond to his frantic calls, the panic that threatened to overwhelm him. He'll always remember the suffocating relief that he felt when he saw Logan sitting up in the hospital bed, alive and well.

But he can't stop the tears that come to his eyes. James gently strokes Logan's dark hair and breathes in the clean scent of the shampoo he always used. His nose is buried in Logan's hair but he doesn't care. "I love you." He whispers into Logan. And then he pulls away just enough to drop a kiss on Logan's forehead.

To his horror, he feels Logan stir at the kiss, his head tilting upwards. He starts to jerk away, hoping that Logan will go back to sleep and never know what just happened. But he's taken by surprise when Logan's hand reaches out and wraps around the back of his head and pulls him back.

Their lips meet and suddenly the only thing James is aware of is the fact that Logan is kissing him. His head seems to spin and lift of his shoulders and his breath leaves him in a rush. His heart races wildly and he pulls Logan closer to him. James has never been high before but he's certain it can't get any better.

They break the kiss at the same time and Logan falls back against James, breathing heavily. "Wow." He says into the darkness.

James is trying to come up with a better way to describe the feelings surging through him but he fails miserably. Instead he nods his head wordlessly.

Logan looks up at him. "Did you mean it?" He asks, his tone hopeful.

"Mean what?" James' head is still spinning but Logan's voice brings him back down to Earth.

Logan pouts a little and the sight is so adorable that James is afraid that he might suffer a heart attack. When did he fall in love with his best friend so fast? "Did you mean it when you said that you loved me?" Logan prompts.

"Yes." It's all he can manage.

Then Logan sits up, his face two inches from James'. "Good." He breathes. "Then I can break up with Camille."

"But I thought-" James doesn't know how he's still breathing much less talking with Logan so close to him. He tries to ask Logan about the big brother thing but Logan stops him by pressing a finger to his lips.

"Shhh." Logan shushes him. "Don't talk." He's completely laying on top of James now and he lays one hand on James' chest before looking up at him with that smile that now drives James crazy. "Your heart feels like it's going to jump out of your chest." He says, laughing softly.

It feels that way too but Logan told him not to say anything so James remains silent.

Logan lays his head underneath James' chin. One hand finds James' hand and their fingers intertwine. "You've always been like a big brother to me, James." He begins to explain softly. "But while we were on tour. . . it started to feel different. And then when we came home I realized that I didn't feel the way I used to feel about Camille." He tips his head to look up at James. "I realized tonight that I felt that way about you. It scared me to admit though so I didn't say anything. And then. . . you said you loved me." He speaks the last words with wonder in his voice. "I thought I was dreaming but then you kissed me and," His free hand brushes James' face softly. "You were crying."

"Because I never thought that you would feel the same way about me." James breaks his silence to explain. "That would be too good to be true."

"I love you." Logan whispers. "Do you believe me?"

"I don't know." James manages to stammer. "It still seems too good-" He breaks off when Logan drags him back down and they kiss again, his head spinning into oblivion. When they break apart,

Logan is grinning and James is struggling to catch his breath.

"Now do you believe me?" Logan asks.

"Yes." James closes his eyes and takes in the moments. "I do."

"Good." Logan sighs in relief and once again settles himself again James. "Because it's the truest thing I've ever said."

"I love you too." James runs a hand through Logan's hair and stares thoughtfully out the open window. "What are we going to tell everyone?" He asks, a little hesitantly.

"The truth." Logan says simply. "We'll tell them that we're madly in love with each other." He shrugs lightly and laughs. "Hey, we are in a boy band. It's practically tradition for at least one member to be gay."

James chuckles and wraps both arms around Logan. _His _Logan. "Sounds good to me. But you get some sleep okay? I don't think the doctors would approve if they heard that you spent all night making out with me."

"Let them think what they want." Logan presses his face into James' shirt. "I think I might be too keyed up to sleep right now."

"Then get some sleep for me." James says solemnly. "Please, Logan." His fingers caress Logan's back and he feels the smaller boy shiver slightly under his touch.

"Only for you." Logan gives in finally and shut his eyes, the steady beating of James' heart lulling him to a sweet slumber.

James smiles when Logan falls asleep and presses his lips to Logan's head before he leans back and shuts his own eyes. He knows one thing for sure: His dreams couldn't possibly get any better than real life.

**A/N. Yeah, okay I have no idea where that came from. Actually I do. But I don't think I can fully explain myself. I'm going to go die now because this was proabbly the worst slash fic ever in the history and everything. Review?**


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